Are you searching for motivation? Stop.
If I am searching for that feeling of wanting to eat kale or write in my journal or get on the yoga mat, I almost never find it. But there is a better way.
I got a lot of feedback from this Tweet. Mostly versions of “same” and “I feel attacked.”
Procrastination and lack of motivation are intense challenges, if you struggle with anxiety or not. Global pandemic or not.
And that is okay.
It’s understandable if right now, accomplishing one little thing per day is all you can handle. I applaud you for that one little thing. Our culture can get more than a little obsessed with optimizing productivity and it feels as if we need to be constantly ACCOMPLISHING to earn our keep.
But sometimes there are some things that we really want to do. We know those things will make us feel better, they will move us towards a future we want, they will help us to feel more grounded and joyful. What should we do when motivation feels impossible to find and even more impossible to maintain?
I think the answer is: stop trying to get motivated.
Forget motivation.
If I am searching for that feeling of wanting to eat kale or write in my journal or get on the yoga mat, I almost never find it.
What I can go to instead is commitment.
Commitment =
purpose + discipline + scheduling
Purpose gets to the WHY of what I’m doing. Is it because I want to have that dopamine rush I get after a workout? Is it because I value living a life that leaves space for creativity?
Discipline is about me obeying myself, and keeping the promises I make to myself. I deserve to take this time to do something that is meaningful to me. Because self-care isn’t selfish, it’s burn-out prevention.
Schedule means that I create space in my day, and I set reminders. I don’t do something because I feel like doing it, I do something because my phone buzzed and told me it’s time to do it. I get it, everyone is busy, so this doesn’t have to mean carving out an hour — if you’ve only got five or ten minutes, great. Schedule that. And set the bar low here. If you think you can do something five times a week, promise yourself three times a week. If you think you can do thirty minutes, promise yourself fifteen. Set yourself up for success.
After I’ve eaten the kale or I’ve written in my journal or I’m lying on my yoga mat after practice - I feel amazing. The “I’m so glad I did that” feeling is what I’m working for. That is the reinforcement of our WHY. And when we make that a habit, it gets easier to stick with because we get that physical and/or emotional reward. And then eventually, maybe some days we really are motivated.
This world feels overwhelming and painful a lot of the time. It’s totally understandable if you do not have a lot of extra energy with which to learn a new language or clean out the garage or start painting watercolors. But if those things bring you a spark of joy, then commit to them. Don’t wait for motivation. Pick a time, pick a frequency, pick a length of time. Say no to something else, if you need to, to create that space in your life.
You can choose where to spend your energy. This is something you have some control over, in a reality where that feels more rare than ever.
